The following is a list of sayings that I have either found on bumperstickers or think would make for good ones.
General
- Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
Human Nature
- Some mistakes are too much fun to make only once.
- To err is human. To blame it on someone else shows management potential.
- Good things come to those who wait, but bad things show up right away.
- You have a point … but if you wore a hat, no one would notice.
- I’d agree with you, but then we’d both be wrong.
Political
- The Opposite of Progress is Congress.
- God will judge Bin Laden. Army Rangers will set up the meeting.
- He ain’t Kinky, he’s my Governor. [Kinky Friedman gubernatorial campaign, 2006, Texas]
- My Governor is a Jewish Cowboy [Kinky Friedman gubernatorial campaign, 2006, Texas; response to pro-Jesus ‘My Boss Is A Jewish Carpenter’ sticker]
- Texas: we don’t care how you did it in California.
Military
- USMC: When It Absolutely, Positively Has To Be Destroyed Overnight.
Geeky
- Products of Berkeley U: LSD and BSD. Coincidence? [adapted from quote attributed to Jeremy S. Anderson]
- Yes, I use Linux. So SU Me. [pun on Unix ‘superuser’ command and reference to Microsoft’s litigious nature]
- My other computer is a Tandem NSK [spoof of the ever-popular ‘My other car is a _____’ sticker, but intended for use on laptops]
- If you’re not part of the solution, then you’re part of the precipitate. [science redirection]
- Go away or I will replace you with a very small shell script.
Brandon's Notepad 